Voting (a public service announcement)
If there is one thing I could tell every marijuana smoker at the same time, it would be to vote. FACT: A whole shitload of people smoke pot. Actually, almost everyone I know smokes pot or has no problem with it. I’m sure that you smoke pot. Pretty sure anyway. Unless your here to give me a verbal razzing on how all stoners are dumb and Jesus is our savior. But you shouldn’t vote anyway.
My point is this. Vote. If you are 18 or over, vote. Why the fuck not? Just register and vote, you ignorant fool.
“But dude, one vote doesn’t count.”
Hey if I vote to shove a hockey stick up your ass, would it count? Numbnuts. One vote does count. And if everyone who said the same thing actually voted life would be a much better place. I mean, not that it’s not nice now, but imagine:
A country where marijuana was legal and readily available, and smoking it was a respected social activity. This is issue 1 on my list. The whole fact that marijuana is illegal makes me want to go shoot babies at the White House.
A country with health insurance for everyone. Maybe I just feel this one more cuz my lung exploded and I was in the hospital for 4 days recovering from near-death. With NO insurance. I will be paying for my ambulance till the day that I die in one. Massive head trauma due to improper use of a 2 pound jar of jalapenos.
A country with free internet. Imagine if the internet were free. It could be. It should be.
A country with legal prostitution. Imagine if you could just go down to 95th and get yourself a whore. Oh wait, you can do that now. Not that I would know.
A country where public urination was legal. Oh wait that would be disgusting. It would be fun for awhile though heh heh heh.
A country where everyone’s hypothalamus was required at birth to be remotely interconnected into a vast abysmal of boundless supercomputers that could be monitored for everything from emotions to medical needs, thus increasing the human life span by 20, even 30 years. Oh wait, that would only happen if I was president.
What I’m trying to say is, if everyone voted that could, the world would be a better place. Or maybe not. What the hell do I know? I know that you should vote. Why not?
“Dude, I don’t have time to vote.”
Shut up. You’re telling me that you don’t have 30 minutes, (sometimes longer when you get some dumb old bitch that talks to the voting booth guy about the good ole’ days when the young whippersnappers had discipline and her uterus was still moist,) out of a Tuesday morning, noon, or night to go push 15 buttons and make a difference? Well if you don’t, I pity you and your insane schedule Mr. Bigfatliarpileofshit. In fact, if you have read up to here than you have enough time. Go vote.
“Dude, I’m a member of a venomous mafia crime family, and voting would alert the FBI of my location and I would be beat down and get poked in my pooter for the rest of my days as the bitch of a convicted murdering ex-running back for the Cleveland Browns who enjoys cold steel things and the congress of the cow position from the Kama Sutra.”
Hmm. I wouldn’t vote if I were you. Unless you want to get more in touch with the other side of your sexuality. But unless you have a decent excuse like that, then for the love of Fruity Pebbles, VOTE!!!!!!!
